


Run away

by lady_black_universe



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Child Abuse, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Marauders Friendship (Harry Potter)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-10
Updated: 2019-06-12
Packaged: 2020-04-24 03:02:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,468
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19164481
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lady_black_universe/pseuds/lady_black_universe
Summary: my take on why Sirius black ran away to the potters and the events after.





	1. the beating

**Author's Note:**

> this is just the beginning, I tend to not only cover the events of why he left but something more.....  
> well, that's all the hints you'll get so I guess you have to keep reading to find out!!

On the gigantic bed of his room at 12 Grimmauld Place Sirius stared at the white fog drifting from his cigarette, the sleeves of his pressed white dress shirt casually rolled up. He glanced at the calendar that hung on the wall in front of him, large crosses covering half of the calendar, showing that there was still a month till school opened. It was a nightmare living here, even worse than most of his summers, and heading to Hogwarts was the only way to wake up.

Taking another drag from his cigarette, he walked to the window, seeing the last of the guests finally leaving. His parents had held a grand dinner, forcing him to act civilized and dress his best. All he did was grudgingly welcome everyone and then he headed back to his room to do nothing.

In fact, it was a surprise when his parents commanded him to stay in his room during the party; usually they’d make him into a house elf, serving to the guest and commanding to be polite; but Sirius wasn’t complaining, it was almost like a blessing staying up here when stuck-up purebloods and death-eater wannabes  were roaming right below him.

On top of this, his summer was going absolute horrible, thank you very much (not like it was ever good). He was thoroughly exhausted. Ever since he arrived he was made into a house elf, being forced to clean the grim house without a single break and then being given only a slice of bread at dinner. It was astonishing that he was even upright after all of this, especially after all the beatings he had to go through.

Sitting back on his bed, he was contemplating changing into his pyjamas and heading to bed. It wasn’t as if his parents would want to see him. At times like this, they preferred to ignore that their disgrace of a son ever existed, and it was fine by him. But the loud footsteps on the stairs heading towards his room beg to differ. He really didn’t have time for one of his father’s shenanigans.

As soon as his father slammed the door open, Sirius abruptly stood, dropping his cigarette and quickly extinguishing it with his foot. He was glad that he hid the packet of muggle cigarettes under his bed, knowing that his father would have burned them if he spotted anything muggle.

It seemed that his father also noticed him extinguishing his cigarette as a small smile showed on his face.

“Glad to see you still know how to respect your elders”- a twisted smile appeared on his father’s face as he slowly approached and sat down on Sirius’ bed – “it seems the lessons are really paying off. Good, good”

Sirius just glared at his father, deciding to keep his mouth, hoping his father would get bored and leave. But that was hardly likely. In the end, just getting out of here with just a few curses would be a blessing. It wasn’t every day that his father just entered his room.

_You could be in a lot of trouble_ , his inner self decided to quip.

_But I’m always in a lot of trouble and he never came in my room before_ , he argued to himself.

He was contemplating the point he made when he was snapped back into reality by his father’s voice.

“but you know you shouldn’t have extinguished that” he drawled on, ignoring his son’s glares, lighting himself a cigar of his own and blowing a long thick stream of white smoke into the air as if to indicate he was in absolutely no hurry at all.

_Great, just great,_ Sirius thought, suppressing the urge to roll his eyes.

Wanting his father to leave, Sirius spoke, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible, keeping the venom out of his voice “didn’t you have something to say, _Father_?”

Averting his gaze from the mystic fog emitting from his cigar, his father took another drag, fog leaving his mouth as he spoke “in a matter of fact, I do”-his father’s somewhat calm eyes suddenly vanished, making Sirius almost flinch at the sharp maniac left in them.

“I have grown tired of this Gryffindor goody two shoes muggle loving act of yours and I am done waiting for you to slip out of it yourself.” his voice deadly calm causing shivers down his spine.

“Father, I am surprised you ever thought that I would simply slip out of it . . .”

A burning slap was felt across his cheek before he was able to complete his sentence.

“You keep that dirty mouth shut of yours! I am in no mood to hear your worthless chatter!”

_Well, there goes keeping your mouth shut_ , Sirius scolded himself as he straightened up and smiled sweetly at his father.

His father ignored and continued his monologue “you will now start taking your rightful place as the heir of The Ancient and Most Noble House of Black and you will stay civilized, keep your mouth shut and do whatever I say.”

With every word the expressional façade he wore for the guest faded and was now replaced by a maddening face.

Sirius acted as if he was pondering over the situation, just to spite his father, of course, he already knew what his decision was “and why do you think I will listen this time?”

A twisted grin stretched across his father’s face as he leaned back as if he was expecting Sirius to ask him that. “You do know what the Dark Lord’s aims are, don’t you?”

_Now, I_ _really don’t like where things are going_ , his father wasn’t known to change the topic so suddenly.

_This isn’t your ordinary chit chat, Sirius, It’s far far worse_ , his inner voice informed.

He really wanted to tell that voice to shut up, but he knew that wouldn’t work because that voice was just him, just the thoughts he wanted to keep hidden, the ideas he never let anyone see.

Taking a breath and taking care his voice remained calm, he spoke: “who doesn’t?”

His father’s wild eyes looked at the boy in front of him and smiled, cigar dangling between his fingers “good. I thought you were stupid enough to not even know who the Dark Lord is.” he chuckled to himself, no humour in his laugh, just madness.

Sirius tightened his fists, his knuckles turning white, trying hard to keep himself under control.

“You’re lucky that the Dark Lord doesn’t care you’re in Gryffindor. In fact, you’re lucky that he’s even giving you a chance. You finally got a chance to redeem yourself. Not everyone is selected by the Dark Lord himself to join his ranks” 

Sirius blood froze. Are they really that stupid, that after opposing his parents' views for his entire life, after making it very clear he wanted no part in this, that he will somehow just abandon all he ever believed just because some crazy maniac offered him to?! 

“and why do you think that I will accept this so-called offer?” each word dripped in venom, as Sirius was visibly trying not to scream and to keep his anger cool; which of course he was obviously failing to do so. Sometimes he really was a true Black, with the temper and everything.

_Don’t think about that now._

“Because you’re a valuable asset to our Lord. You’re so-called ‘alliances’ with the blood-traitor, half-blood and mud blood are perfect for our Dark Lord’s aim.” His father drawled on as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“they are not my ‘alliances’, they’re my friends in fact, they are more family than you all will ever be and if you obviously think that I will betray my friends and become a bloody death eater then you’re more stupid and IDIOTIC THAN I THOUGHT YOU WERE!” with each word, Sirius' voice got louder and louder, all sense of staying silent flying out of the window. When his father insulted him, he could keep quiet, but no one ever insulted his friends and got away with it, not under Sirius’ watch.

Slowly extinguishing his cigar underneath his foot, his father turned his attention back to Sirius “I really don’t think you understand”- his father slowly stood, his eyes boring into Sirius’-“I don’t care what you think. You’re now supposed to do what I say.”

“Do what you say?”-Sirius scoffed, anger getting the better of him-“I AM NOT GOING TO JOIN THAT STUPID BASTARD’S RANKS, I AM NOT GOING TO BETRAY MY FRIEND NOR AM I GOING TO LISTEN TO YOUR STUPID PURE BLOODED WAYS!”

It was then that he noticed the wand in his father hand, itching to strike.

Before Sirius could do anything to defend himself before he could even move, he was hit by a familiar but unbearable pain. He fell to his knees as the pain circulated through his entire body. the pain was so intense so all-consuming that he didn’t even know where he was… white hot knives were piercing every inch of his skin, his screams echoing across the room.

When his father removed the curse, Sirius lay on the ground, the pain still ripping his entire body.

“Would you like to change your statement?” a twisted yet satisfied smile was etched on his face.

Gathering all his strength, Sirius lifted himself onto his knees, his hair sticking to his sweat covered forehead.

“I don’t regret a single word I said” he rasped, his voice was hoarse and barely a whisper, probably from all the screaming.

_Of course from all the screaming, there is no probably in this,_ he thought to himself.

 “Oh, I’ll make sure you regret it.”


	2. chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here we go another chapter!! Enjoy!!!

Crucio!”

Once again the pain hit Sirius’ body, although he had experienced the curse several times, every single time it was a pain that was beyond anything had ever experienced, his very bones were on fire . . . he wanted it to stop . . .  to end . . .  to black out . . . to die.

All of a sudden, the curse was removed. His entire body was filled with pain and his chest ached.

He thought it was finally over but in fact, his father had decided you use a different method of torture. One by one, hexes and curses racked Sirius’ already heaving frame. This was a different pain altogether. They were coming in such close succession that his body was never able to recover from the last hex before another curse came pummeling into his body.

Above the noise of his blood pumping in his ears, he could make out his father’s voice, “YOU . . . WILL . . . NOW . . . DO . . . AS . . . I . . . SAY!” with each word a hex was thrown his way. It felt like an eternity and he just wanted it to end. After a while, Sirius stopped trying to prepare for the pain and just hoped it would stop soon as his screams continued to ricochet off the walls of his room.

Before Sirius knew it his father was looming over his prone figure, saying something he couldn’t hear through the constant ringing in his ear. It was only when his father grabbed the collar of his shirt, lifting him up into the air that he got a glimpse of what his father was saying “. . . don’t make me use the imperious curse on you, son, cause if you don’t agree that is exactly what I’ll do” and with that Sirius felt himself being hurled across the room, hitting the wall with a defying crack and unceremoniously slumping against the wall.

His world was spinning and he felt as if he would be sick any minute but before he could do anything he saw someone walking towards him at a leisurely pace.

His father crouched at his son’s barely conscious body and yanked his left arm towards him, roughly pushing up the sleeve, causing Sirius to grit his teeth at the sudden pain.

“What . . . what . . .  are you doing?” Sirius managed to ask, despite the pain that was flowing through his body. He was still quite surprised at how he was even able to stay conscious after all that but learnt early on to not question his body on how it was able to survive.  After all the punishments he had to endure from an early age, it seemed that his body was able to adapt, even though the pain never got better.

His father leaned closer to his face, sneering, and his voice now a deadly whisper.

“Giving you an example of what will take place when I tell the Dark Lord that you humbly accept his invite”

His father then pressed the tip of his wand to Sirius’ forearm and muttered a spell that Sirius was unable to hear. Sirius screamed from the intensity of the searing pain, his back lifting off the floor, feeling as if his arm was being ripped apart from the body. It was like 10 crutiatus curses all centred at his arm, unlike anything he felt before. Unable to bear the pain any longer, Sirius was engulfed by the familiar yet welcoming darkness.

\- - - - - - - -- - - -- - - - - - --- -- - - - - - --  -- - - -  -- - - - - - -- -  - - - - -- - -- -  - - - - - -  - - - - - -- - 

Sirius felt his ears ringing from the countless curses he had endured. Everything seemed foggy and he shook his head trying to remove the haze but as soon as he did, he absolutely regretted it. He grabbed his head with his unbroken hand and a raspy groan left his split lips.

 _Never ever shake your head to remove haziness, no matter what your stupid brain says, it NEVER works._ He scolded.

Despite the agony and the desire to let the darkness consume him again, he urged his head upwards, taking a glimpse around the room. It was empty just like before, the room silent and the door still closed as if nothing had happened. Letting out a breath he didn’t even know he was holding, he sighed

 _Thank Merlin he’s finally gone._ He thought as he carefully positioning himself upright despite the protests of pain and agony.

His entire body was on fire and his chest ached. With every painful breath, he could feel his ribs rattling. He never felt this much pain ever and he never wanted to feel it again. What hurt the most was his left arm, the excruciating pain blinding his senses; the pain in his body was just a dull buzz in comparison to what he was feeling in his arm. He studied his arm carefully; it was a giant gash starting from his wrist to his elbow on his forearm, blood slowly seeping out of the cut. Looking closely, he could see a red burn forming around the gash, seeming to take some form of shape. Squinting, he stared at the burn, when he suddenly inhaled sharply his slowed pain-induced brain finally remembered where he saw such a shape before. 

The burn was slowly taking the shape of the dark mark, a skull forming at the top of the gash, with a snake’s head forming where the gash ended. His finger slowly traced the burn, seeing how it wasn’t in its usual black instead just a reddish burn on his skin, bright red sticking out on his pale skin.

_I guess only Voldemort can do it_

He forcefully tugged the sleeve of his shirt down, covering the mark, tearing his gaze away from it. Hoping it would fade, he rubbed a hand across his chest, it had really started to hurt as if a cord was tightening around his neck, cutting his breath into pants.

He closed his eyes, resting his head against the wall, deciding what to do next. His entire body hurt, his heart just wouldn't stop racing and his father's words wouldn't stop ricocheting in his brain.

_Don’t make me use the imperious curse on you, son, 'cause if you don’t agree that is exactly what I’ll do_

Mentally shaking his head, he decided he could focus on these thoughts later, probably when he wasn't at the risk of passing out.

Using his good arm and mustering the strength left within him, he grunted as he slowly lifted himself up against the wall. Just lifting himself up was painful, his body protesting as his knees threatened to give in.  Gritting his teeth, he slowly moved towards the bed, falling more rather than sitting when he reached it. His fingers gripped the bed, as he tried to even out his breathing. The world threatened to tilt; it felt like he was on some weird rollercoaster.  After a few minutes when his breathing became as stable as it could get, he glanced at his trunk that was leaning against his bed, still packed.

 

He looked around at the room that had been his for as long as he could remember. The bright red and gold Gryffindor walls, the muggle posters that adorned those walls just to spite his parents and then his eyes fell on the one picture that could make him smile after everything. There on the wall was a picture of four boys, waving at the camera, youth splashed on their faces as they laughed as if they ruled the world. 

Willing his eyes away from the frame, he gathered all his things as quickly as he could, the smallest act sending pain throughout his body, shoving them in his trunk before he could change his mind. He knew he wouldn't be able to heal the numerous wounds that graced his tiring body and now his home had become too dangerous to live in. with a short spell, he had shrunk his trunk and put it in his pocket. 

Glancing at the picture of his best friends, his true family, he smiled sadly, regretting leaving it behind but it was permanently stuck there.

_Oh well, at least it's a reminder to my parents where my real home is_

Consciously, pulling down the sleeve of his left arm once again, he reached into the pocket of his jeans for his wand and praying that he had enough strength within him, Sirius disapparated

\- - - - - -- - - - - - - - -- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -- - - - - - - - - - - - - --  - -  

He apparated in front of a large brightly lit manor; almost every window was brightly lit and the front garden was filled with an assortment of different colored flowers and bushes. Warm light filled the garden and the manor was a bright beacon among the darkness, a pleasant difference from the dark gloom of his home.

Sirius racked a hand through his dishevelled hair, he hadn't had enough energy after the beating and apparating took away all the energy he had left. Swaying dangerously, Sirius quickly grabbed the front gate. The pain in his chest had ramped from a dull throb all the way to a searing blinding agony faster than he could blink. He blinked furiously willing the tears away as his breaths starting coming in pants. Glancing once more at the house in front of him, he pushed open the gate, hoping the occupants of the house would let him stay just for a night.

Reaching the front door, all the strength he had suddenly left him as he stared at the gold lion knocker

_What if they don't want me?_

_What if they hate me for annoying them at such an hour?_

_What if they pity me and treat me as if I'm some fragile vase?_

Shaking his head, he quickly lifted his hand to the knocker and knocked twice. He couldn’t feel anything over the sharp pain in his chest and it was taking all his energy just to stand straight.

when Sirius felt as if no one was coming, _why would they it's the middle of the night?,_ the door opened revealing a 16 year old boy with messy raven hair that Sirius would call a combination of Hagrid’s beard and the whomping willow, a pair of giant round specks perched on the edge of his nose, wearing in what appeared to be golden snitch pyjamas.

He was clearly annoyed to be disturbed at such an ungodly hour but seeing Sirius was not was he was expecting if the widened eyes and pale complexion was anything to go by.

“S . . . Sirius?!”

“Hello James,” - Sirius choked, smiling despite the pain, trying to give his friend a little reassurance- “Mind if I come in?”

Sirius' voice was raw and scratchy from all the screaming, sounding as if he hadn’t used it for a while.

“What the hell happened to you?!” James quickly pulled open the door letting his friend in.

“Oh you know this and that” Sirius croaked absentmindedly; he really wasn’t in the mood to tell James what really happened. Sirius was only able to take a few steps when the pain in his chest suddenly intensified, the world spun and Sirius fell to his knees, hearing someone call his name from what sounded like a mile away.

**Author's Note:**

> I hoped you liked it! so plz like and review


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